The saddest sight

Our back yard abuts a cemetery. It's a church cemetery and not very active, with about a dozen or so headstones. There's a guy who does maintenance maybe 5 times during the year, mostly just mowing the grass. The most use it sees is during the summer when the neighborhood kids play in the open field and around July 4th when it's used to blow off fireworks. For the most part, everyone who goes back there respects the gravesites and tries to stay as far away from them as possible.

In the 5 years we've been here, I think there's been maybe 2 funerals and almost no visitors. That is until the last few months. For the past couple of months, ever since the last funeral, there's been a white car that has driven into the cemetery every day without fail, rain, snow, or shine, and spent time at that one gravesite. It's the saddest sight. Sometimes a man gets out, sometimes he just sits in his car. A couple of times he's gotten out, shoveled the snow or pulled some weeds. It's just so sad to watch him, you can just feel the loneliness and the love. Sometimes I feel like I should go and offer coffee or something, but he seems to want to make the journey alone. Whoever he is, I wish him peace.

HTML hell

Ok, I admit it, I'm an idiot when it comes to HTML. If anyone can help me with changing and modifying my blog, Estelle, you seem to be more than adept at it, I'd appreciate it. I did my best with the patience I had to add links and make the changes I wanted, but I'm still struggling. That and I've lost my patience for now. I will probably come back later and actually read the directions...novel thought...but for now, I'm toast.

Mostly I want to have all the links align, rather than indenting themselves, and make some changes to their colors and general appearance. I also want the categories more separated and distinct and not just on top of each other.

I know, I look like a damn newbie, but I swear, I've been online for years, just never had to deal with the HTML part of things.

Life in Oregon or California might be an option

I hate worker's comp. I've been dealing with their frustrating bullshit for nearly 18 years, fighting for every crumb they so graciously toss my way. The latest round is even more annoying than the past.

Several months ago, I was ordered to yet again go to an IME, independent medical examiner. I use the term "independent" very lightly. Worker's comp has done this many times over the years, ordering me to go to an IME, each time having to prove I'm actually disabled. It's very demeaning, dehumanizing and degrading. Not to mention, a fucking pain in the ass. The last time, as with most others in the past, I admitted that I use, let's just say, alternative herbal medicine for pain management. I've been on nearly every narcotic or pain medicine that can be prescribed and they don't do squat. I'd much rather use my medicine of choice, one that doesn't rot my kidneys or liver, and that actually does the job. Living with neurological pain 24/7 does not make me happy. Anyway, this asshole for a doctor was the first to actually put into his report that I use this medicine, and now Worker's Comp is threatening to withdraw a settlement offer unless I testify before the Worker's Comp Board. The problem with testifying is that if I deny my statement, I lose all credibility and possibly the entire case for the past 18 years. If I don't deny it and admit to using it, I risk a criminal investigation.

The WC case is in NY state, which has decriminalized marijuana. It's still illegal, but the punishments are minimal, especially when the amount in possession is small. Connecticut, on the other hand, where I live, will still fine you $1,000 and put you in jail for one joint. Now the fact that it goes across state lines, I think, might mean it then becomes a federal case. Fucking beautiful. If I say or do nothing, I get exactly ZERO for a settlement and I cannot make any more claims for equipment, medical attention or anything under this claim. It will be closed. If I testify, I would probably get the settlement but then run the risk of having to use it for bail and legal fees.

I'm researching my options and talking to lawyers in both states. I hope to have some kind of a reasonable answer in the next few weeks. It would be so nice to live in a state that recognizes some people need medicines that aren't part of the allopathic pharmaceutical world.

In Union Hell

Let me just say that I support unions. I have been a member of one in the past and I loved not being afraid to speak my mind, knowing I had job security. The awesome insurance benefits were a definite bonus as well. Unions are wonderful things when they do the job they were originally meant for...securing employment and safety of the employees.

I interpreted for a union meeting tonight and they spent 2 hours whining about the new employees' hourly wage (too low), and the insurance package their employer is offering (too expensive). I'm listening to the numbers they're tossing around, remaining as neutral as I can, and inside wanting to scream...get a real fucking job in the real world and stop whining! The new employees make more than I do after 6 years of employment with my agency, and their not-good-enough benefits are STILL better and less expensive than mine. To top it off, the officer with the gavel was right behind me and he seemed to really get off on using it. I was really close to shoving it somwhere very uncomfortable for him. I left with a pounding (no pun intended) headache.

I work for a non-profit agency and I love working for them. Sure, it has its share of problems and I wish some things were different and I had better insurance, but overall, it's a damn good place to work and the people are really great. With my profession, unless you work for a school district or a state, there really aren't unions for us. At the national conferences there's been talk of joining one, but it hasn't gone any farther than that. I think interpreters by nature are more independent and wouldn't easily fit into the groupthink union mold.

I left that meeting really angry, wishing those lunkheads would stop whining about having great pay and benefits and knowing why so many companies are shipping their work overseas. The headache is slowly going away, too.

Damn Mechanics

Ok, so this is my first official rant. It's a relatively minor issue, but annoying none-the-less.

I took my car in to get the brakes worked on. I take it to a real mechanic, not the grease hounds at the oil change joints. Those places are fine for an oil change, dealing with tires or something basic, but not real mechanic work. I want a guy working on my car who actually gives a shit about the work he does, not some kid who doesn't have a vested interest in the business. I left the car there around 1pm with the expectation that it would be done by 4pm. Now they know that I rely on my car big time for my work and they know I took the day off so my car could get worked on and I wouldn't have to rent a car for the day. Theye also know I needed it back by 4, 4:30 at the latest so I could get to an appointment. I called at 4 and the guy is out of the shop PICKING UP PARTS! Call me crazy, but when I gave them the information about my car LAST WEEK, they should have had all the necessary parts ready, not to mention, it was 3 hours later and they still hadn't done anything but pull off the tires?! Needless to say, I had to cancel my appointment, something I hate doing.

He just called, my car is finally ready. No idea what the ultimate cost will be, but he only had to replace the front rotors, something I knew was needed. Now I can stop my car...what a novel concept.

Look out world

Ok, so I've been reading blogs of friends and figured it was about damn time I created one for myself. I have way too much to say and this is a great medium. So, look out world, my ramblings, rants, random thoughts and who knows what else are about to be released into the cybersphere.