Karma

The scumbag who fucked me over and lied to me for 7 months about a potential adoption for us has apparently died. I say apparently because he had a lot of people who wanted to kick his ass for a variety of reasons. Some of these people had the means to see him dead. I don't know if he's truly dead or this is another scam to go underground. I'll find out.

Either way, I've got to admit that I have mixed feelings about this. He was actually a friend until about 5 or 6 years ago, when he got connected to some really fucked up people, got into drugs and gambling, and lost everything. He just scammed people left and right, including me, from then on. He stole a few thousand dollars from me, ostensibly in the process of fixing my car. I wrote him checks for parts and instead of putting in say, a new transmission, he bought one for $150 at the junk yard and pocketed the rest. I wanted to believe him, I really did. I'd known the guy for like 15 years and had no reason to doubt him. Ok, so you steal money from me, fuck you, but I can get over that. Don't fuck with my heart.

Around 3 years ago, we had decided to give up on trying to conceive and try adoption. Neither of us wanted to go through the state system, a requirement here even if you're doing private adoption through an agency. We know people who did and went through hell. I simply couldn't be scrutinized by a social worker, stressed out like that, only to have her/him tell me no. So we decided to try word of mouth. We told everyone we knew that we were hoping to adopt this way and just crossed our fingers. Well lo and behold, Zenny had found us a miracle. He told me of a college age girl from a wealthy family. She was pregnant, choosing adoption, and the family wanted everything kept hush-hush. They would pay for everything, their lawyer had tons of connections in the state and we wouldn't have to go through the usual system. Way too good to be true. All I had to do was wait for a call from their lawyer and the ball would be rolling. Oh, but the lawyer is on vacation. Then the family was on vacation. Then someone was overseas...yadda yadda. You get the picture. Well vulnerable and desperate me, I believed the story he wove, more and more intricate every time he told it. He kept me hanging on for months until I finally woke up to his lies and I was beyond devastated. No, no money ever changed hands for this, but I certainly wished him pain and suffering.

All Zenny wanted his entire life was money. His father died a few weeks ago and he would have gotten some. Now he won't. Oh well. Karma is a beautiful thing.

Rabbi Michael A. Robinson

This was the Rabbi that I grew up with. Rabbi Robinson. Rabbi Mike. Mike. All others pale in comparison.

Rabbi Robinson was well known for his outspoken political and social views. He never minced words and he pissed off a fair number of people in the process. The word Rabbi means teacher, and he certainly was just that. He taught us about humanity, that we are all intrinsically connected to each other and the world. That we cannot wake up in the morning, get out of our warm bed, in our safe home, eat a healthy meal and not think about every other human being on this planet who doesn't have that bed, home, safety, or food. And not just think about them, but work to correct the inequity. Rabbi Robinson lived and breathed to work for peace and social justice. Many of my political and social views and actions are a direct result of growing up learning from him. He was like a second father to me.

In stark contrast to most religious teachings of the time, when I came out to him, he was proud of me and told me that he had more respect for gay and lesbian couples because they stay together out of love. There's no legal marriage, usually no kids to consider, and their devotion to each other is real, not some socially contrived concept of a relationship. I loved this man.

I learned last week that Rabbi Robinson passed away. The world is a much emptier place.